status
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she will never be big
rediscovered she will never be big by ff00ff, an absolute banger of a song that i first listened to on cohost
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tugged
j and i watched kpop demon hunters yesterday! my fave character was mira, his was zoey
the song "what it sounds like" tugged both of our heartstrings
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brimming with ideas
how convenient to not bring my sketchbook to work on a day when i find myself brimming with ideas to draw !!!
(there's loose paper everywhere, so perhaps it isn't too bad)
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lovely scents
i wonder what other scents i can experience at home! just tried the peach, carob, and rose petals tea from a set J shared with me and mom, it was lovely
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attempt to linger
yesterday's sadness was a surprise. in its attempt to linger, i sat down with it (begrudgingly)
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mood lifter
been listening to the Packed to the Gills OST on repeat for a while now! a definite mood lifter. my favorite is Level 3 - Scallop Session
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lingering sense
a subtle yet lingering sense of anxiety looms over me this morning; i want to devour it
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a non-fact
woke up to the sound of cats yowling outside my apartment; i was very pleased with the fact that it's already the weekend, and i can safely go back to sleep
woke up with a start an hour later (it's still friday)
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lived experience
what a rollercoaster of a day; at the end of it all, i'm happy it's part of my lived experience
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the obvious answer
i feel like the answer to solving my problem (re: why doesn't the background and border color change for the details tag) should be obvious, but for now it isn't!!!
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consume
currently in the middle of something that feels overwhelming; may this bitterness not consume me
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zooming out
seems unfair to define the entire month as “bad” simply because of a few select bad days. there’s the need to constantly remind myself of the bigger picture
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cat renamed
before logging off, J shared that in his neko atsume 2 game, he renamed the cat “Tubbs” to “Snorlax”; i can definitely see the resemblance!
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through mud
the past week felt like going through mud: slow and messy. it’s a combination that leaves me with moments of panic, frustration, and overwhelm (i hope this week is slightly better)
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lack of cat
there are downsides to working remotely; my most pressing concern is being unable to greet the neighbor’s cat who visits our office sometimes
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yard visit
my partner installed neko atsume 2 as soon as he realized i was playing the sequel (he installed the first game initially; now he plays both)
we can visit each other's yards! i love it
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a little surprise
on the way home from a friend’s house, a father and pre-school daughter sat next to me.
she whispered to her dad, “i have a surprise for you.” her dad asked what it was, and she let out a loud fart inside the van. (i did not hold back a giggle)
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erotica writers and cervical cancer
read veronique's mailing zines + sketchbook things, where she mentioned reading...
Anaïs Nin a sea of lies by Léonie Bischoff, and it fascinated me, so i decided to look for more info on...
Anais Nin herself; i saw she died from ...
cervical cancer, and that scared me, and i remembered that there were...
free cervical screening and vaccination efforts in my city last year, and so i went to check if there are any initiatives for 2025. so far there are no announcements
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a good run
cohost.org now redirects to the wayback machine…you had a good run, eggbug
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inaccessible
it was surprising to realize my panic when i couldn't access this platform (along with the frantic clearing of cache to no avail)
but the relief from seeing it load again was even more so!
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on repeat
thank you For Melon - Mint Chip from the Sex Advice Succubus OST for existing (and also for making me hyper-focus on my tasks for the last 8 hours today i am delighted!!!)
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exhausted
it feels weird to work on a thing all day and still end up with said thing not being finished yet; even making progress feels like "wasted time" somehow
edit on 12-12-24: even having the expectation that there will be revisions didn't soften the frustration i felt when i received actual revisions
the obvious solution would be to do my work at 100%!! so i have a 0% chance of going back to it!!! it's my present self's problem that she's currently able to do things at only 40% these days
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savory bananas
my partner shared that the banana i gave him earlier tasted savory; the fact that he brought it up 20 mins later is strangely endearing to me
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today's level of anxiety is...
today's level of anxiety may be awful, but i'm making progress with my commissions! onwards to my 2nd biggest fear yet (aka backgrounds)
on a positive note, i love how the characters turned out
edit: i used up 90% of my energy for the foreground, and it's a bit funny to see the remaining background layers becoming progressively worse